What is The "Ma-Ma" technique?
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Who is the author?
1-Role and Impact:
-Peter Nixon, author and trainer focused on empowering current and emerging
leaders through dialogue.
-Creator of the Potential Dialogue System, impacting over 500 organizations
across 60 countries.
2-Philosophy:
-Advocates that optimal outcomes are achievable through dialogue, encapsulated
in his slogan: “The solution is in the dialogue.”
-Believes in the duty to realize one’s potential while aiding others in
realizing theirs (Potentialism).
3-Publications:
Author of several influential books, including:
-Dialogue Gap (2012) – praised as one of
the best business titles of the century.
-Negotiation: Mastering Business in Asia (2005).
-The Business Developer’s Playbook (2018).
-Corporate Culture (2018).
-The Star Negotiator Casebook (2008).
-Developed popular Dialogue Playing Cards featured in in-flight magazine.
4-Professional Experience:
-Advised on topics such as sales, change management, bilateral negotiations,
and conflict resolution.
-Early career in auditing with PwC in multiple international cities.
5-Teaching and Workshops:
-Renowned for engaging, practical workshops rated among the best attended.
-Teaches courses globally at universities and business schools, including CUHK
(MBA) and other international institutions.
6-Media and Recognition:
-Featured speaker on platforms like TEDx and has appeared on CNBC and Discovery
Channel.
-His clients have won numerous awards for the work done under his guidance.
7-Adventures and Challenges:
-Had life-threatening experiences, including detentions, natural disasters, and conflicts across various countries.
-Engaged in cultural experiences, like participating in Pushkar’s Mela festival.
8-Personal Background:
-Born in Montreal, married in Geneva, and resides in Hong Kong with his family.
-Enjoys music, reading, travel, and outdoor adventures.
9-Community Involvement:
-Serving in various educational and charitable roles in Hong Kong and globally.
-Holds qualifications and degrees from multiple prestigious institutions, and is a Canadian Chief Scout.
What are you selling?
- As the author mentioned, efore exploring the essence of selling, it's important to ask, "What are you selling?" Many people view selling through their experiences with aggressive salespeople pushing products like insurance or consumer goods, often prioritizing their commissions over the buyer's needs. This approach can leave buyers frustrated, as seen when one individual questioned their life insurance agent about the number of policies they should buy.
-This book focuses not on selling products, but on selling yourself, your ideas, and your services. The English language lacks distinct terms for selling inanimate products versus living entities, which are fundamentally different. For instance, buying dog food is straightforward, while the experience of owning a dog can vary greatly over time.
-Despite the differences, both types of selling are often labeled the same, although selling oneself is sometimes referred to as influencing or negotiation.
-The key distinctions between selling products and selling oneself include:
1) Product buyers typically understand what
they are purchasing, leading to a consistent ownership experience, and
2)
Selling oneself involves a more dynamic and variable interaction.
What is Selling?
1-Understanding Selling:
-Selling is often misconceived, typically linked to aggressive sales tactics
for inanimate products.
-Many buyers are left with a bad taste due to salespeople prioritizing their
needs over buyer needs.
2-Two Types of Selling:
1-Selling inanimate products involves straightforward purchasing
experiences (e.g., consumer goods).
2-Selling living entities (self, ideas, services) involves subjective
experiences and varies over time.
3-Key Differences:
a-Product Experience:
-Buyers understand what they're getting (physical or contractual).
-Ownership experience remains relatively consistent.
b-Living Acquisition Experience:
-Buyers can only imagine what they gain.
-Experience evolves and can vary significantly over time.
What are Types of Selling Situations?
Types of Selling Situations:
1-Selling Yourself:
For a job, raise, promotion, marriage, or business partnership.
2-Selling Ideas:
For funding, change initiatives, non-profit support, or societal visions.
3-Selling Services:
-To members or as a professional service provider.
Implications for Job Seekers:
Stand out by building connections and creating a visible presence to attract
employers.
Understand and negotiate salary based on market value and personal worth.
4-Selling for a Raise:
Demonstrate increased value by producing more output.
Consider organizational stability (growing, shrinking, or stable) when
negotiating.
5-Selling for a Promotion:
Showcase ongoing high performance and management's recognition of your value.
Avoid becoming aggressive; remind others respectfully of your contributions.
6-Selling for Partnerships:
Evaluate shared values, ethics, and behavioral responses under stress.
Seek advice from neutral third parties for perspectives on potential
partnerships.
7-Selling Startup Ideas:
Create concise pitches focused on market opportunities and funding needs.
Utilize a supportive network for introductions and assessments.
8-Selling Change:
Overcome barriers by addressing stakeholder concerns and identifying issues
involved.
Understand the significance of timing and the political landscape surrounding
change initiatives.
9-Selling Non-Profit Support:
-Rebuild relationships before making requests for support.
-Understand preferences and ensure helpfulness before asking for assistance.
-Political and Social Advocacy:
-Mobilize through branding and marketing; understand the competitive landscape.
-Foster dialogue for optimal outcomes.
10-Selling Peace:
-Dialogue helps resolve conflicts that have emotional and rational components.
-Understanding the perspectives of all stakeholders is crucial for future
cooperation.
11-Selling Services to Members:
-Membership organizations must provide clear value and personalized engagement
to retain members.
-Leadership alignment is essential to successfully demonstrate value.
12-Selling Professional Services:
Focus on a thorough process that incorporates feedback and adapts to changes
over time.
What is Dialogue Selling?
Dialogue selling can be summarized as follows:
1-Definition:
Dialogue selling is a sales process that emphasizes effective communication and
understanding between the seller and the buyer. It aims to create a meaningful
connection rather than simply pushing a product or service.
2-Key Principles:
-Engagement: Involves engaging prospective buyers through dialogue, allowing
for an interactive exchange of ideas and feedback.
-Understanding Needs: Focuses on understanding the needs, preferences, and
concerns of buyers before presenting solutions.
-Building Relationships: Prioritizes relationship-building by fostering trust
and rapport, ensuring that both parties feel valued in the conversation.
-Dynamic Process: Recognizes that the sales process is not linear and may
require adjustments based on ongoing dialogue and feedback from the buyer.
3-Application:
-Customizing Pitches: Sellers can tailor their approach based on buyer
responses and feedback, making sales conversations more relevant and
personalized.
-Addressing Concerns: Enables sellers to identify and address any objections or
hesitations the buyer may have, leading to more effective resolutions.
-Long-Term Focus: Encourages a focus on long-term relationships and repeat
business rather than immediate sales, aligning with the evolving needs of the
buyer.
4-Outcome:
By focusing on dialogue instead of traditional sales tactics, sellers can
achieve better alignment with buyers’ expectations, and leading to higher
satisfaction.
5-Overview of Dialogue Selling:
In every sales scenario, both buyers and sellers play leading and following
roles.
The process emphasizes mutual understanding of strengths and weaknesses.
Five Steps of the Dialogue Selling Process:
1-Plan:
-Earn the right to discuss client needs through experience and expertise.
-Importance of thorough preparation before engaging with clients.
2-Connect:
-Build and maintain a network by mapping relationships and assessing strengths.
-Use social media and internal networks to stay connected.
3-Dialogue:
-Engage in active conversations to understand needs and desires.
a- The "Ma-Ma" technique:
-Utilize techniques like the "Ma-Ma" method (mirror-ask) for
effective communication.
-The "Ma-Ma" technique in communication involves mirroring or
reflecting the other party's words or emotions back to them as a way to show
that you are listening and validating their feelings.
-This
technique involves asking questions that explore common ground or expressed
needs, such as "What...?" or "How...?" -This technique
helps confirm what you have heard, get a yes from the other party, and gives
you time to figure out what to ask about next.
-
It also helps uncover hidden needs, builds common ground, and opens a way ahead
for generating issues and options. Bringing the "Ma-Ma" technique to
the table can be a valuable tool in business development.
b-Relationship Threads:
-Follow
relationship threads for deeper connections.
-Relationship threads are the connections we have with others based on shared
experiences, people, or things that bind us together. These threads can be
essential in forming and strengthening relationships, as they provide a
foundation for connection.
-The more relationship threads we have in common with someone, the stronger our relationship with them tends to be. It is possible to have relationship threads in common with strangers, but if we are unaware of these connections, we remain strangers to each other.
-Close friends and family often have many relationship threads in common, but
over time, without new shared experiences, these threads can become fragile and
break. However, new people continually come into our lives, and some of them
may become even closer to us than those we have known for years.
Note:
The book aims to emphasize the importance of recognizing and nurturing relationship threads, as they play a crucial role in initiating and maintaining relationships in sales and beyond. By following up on relationship threads and strengthening connections through shared experiences, individuals can build stronger, more meaningful relationships with others.
4-Record/Synch:
-Document opportunities and maintain an organized tracking system.
-Use the Bulldog Opportunity Tracker to capture leads and contacts.
What is the Bulldog
Opportunity Tracker used for?
A: The Bulldog Opportunity Tracker is used for recording and synchronizing
various sales activities, such as qualifying leads and opportunities , updating
business cards , and tracking referrals .
What are some examples of non-sales opportunities mentioned in the book?
A: The book mentions that the "relationship thread" can include
non-sales opportunities, such as asking questions of other people and building
relationships over time.
5-Act:
-Pursue leads based on their qualification, being proactive about follow-ups.
-Conduct research and adapt proposals based on client needs and competitive landscape.
What is " Rain Maker"?
-Successful rainmakers in professional services selling are described as
talented individuals who are able to win business anywhere.
-They
are sociable, energetic, and have the ability to engage others through active
body language and engaging conversation.
-
While not everyone may possess these qualities naturally, it is important to
find and use topics that ignite your passion and energy when discussing them.
-It
is recommended to avoid diving into business development efforts until you have
the energy to be outgoing and engaging with potential clients.
What is Business Development Roadmap?
Business Development Approach:
1-Focus on delivering value through discussions, maintaining relationships over
time, and transitioning from cold sales tactics to warm dialogues.
2-Continuous feedback and improvement are integral for success.
3-Importance of Emotional Intelligence:
-Sales professionals should be sociable, energetic, curious, and self-confident
to enhance their effectiveness.
4-Reinforcing Relationships
-Stay in touch with clients through non-sales opportunities and express
gratitude to cultivate goodwill and potential referrals.
5-Real-world Application:
Aim for continuous improvement and practice in selling while adjusting
strategies to fit the evolving market needs.
6-Principles of Sales Success:
-Build trust and rapport through genuine relationships and dialogue-focused
selling rather than traditional sales tactics.
-This structured approach emphasizes the cyclical nature of the sales process,
where continuous interaction and relationship building lead to long-term
success.
What is Relationship Selling?
Summary of Relationship Selling Principles:
1-General Overview:
According to Peter Nixon,The Business Developer’s Playbook I classify my relationship sales principles into three groups, each named with a Sanskrit word:
1-The first group, I name the Indra group, in recognition of Indra’s Net, an
ancient Hindu concept that we are all interconnected like in a cobweb, so our
actions must consider everyone else in the web.
-Change
leaders sometimes get frustrated when their plans face resistance from others,
but once they recognise they too are part of Indra’s Net, they will place more
importance on dialogue with other stakeholders about whatever it is they are
trying to sell. We are all connected whether we like to believe it, or not.
-We cannot build walls to divide us because walls wither. Relationship threads continue through generations.
2-I name the second group of relationship selling principles Karma.
-Karma is a Sanskrit term which suggests our future is a direct result of our intent and actions in the present.
3-The third category of relationship selling principles, I call Mandala, again a Sanskrit term, this time referring to the activity of focusing attention by making a representation of the universe, sometimes using coloured sand crystals, which upon completion, are brushed away destroying the mandala and reminding the creators of the impermanence of everything.
Whereas
the first group reminds us of the importance of relationships, the second group
reminds us of the importance of behavior.
The
third group reminds us of the need to sustain our efforts over time if we are
to achieve results.
2-"ah-ha" moments:
21 principles relationship sales
principles which represent significant "ah-ha" moments for the author:
1. You don’t have clients you have relationships.
2. Relationships cool if not maintained.
3. Never cease to develop relationships.
4. Some clients can’t say yes but don’t want to say no.
5. Interrupt relationship building to do your work.
6. Say thank you.
7. Keep your word.
*The Karma Group of relationship sales principles (selling = behaviour)
8. Help the buyer to say no if you realize they can’t say yes.
9. Network internally to facilitate cross selling.
Relationship Selling Principles
10. Don’t focus on yourself, focus on the other party.
11. Ask lots of questions to surface unstated needs.
12. Keep building your SECS Appeal.
13. Give client something to remember you.
14. Reward those who refer you (appropriately).
*The Mandala Group of relationship sales principles (selling =
persistence)
15.
Make 5 contacts/day, 25/week, 100/month, 1200/year.
16. Respond to the needs of others, regardless of feedback.
17. Ask for business and ask for referral.
18. Continuously improve your service and quality.
19. Learn all about your competitors.
20. Become knowledgeable of all related prices.
21. Persist, persist, persist.
3-Relationships Source:
A.Learning from Family:
Principle of Rewarding Referrals: Recognize and reward clients who refer
business to you.
Challenges with legislation regarding rewards vs. kickbacks.
B.Learning from Colleagues
Differentiation of Suspects and Prospects:
-Suspects: Potential clients yet to be qualified.
-Prospects: Qualified leads with opportunities.
C. Ask for Business/Referrals: Regularly request leads without feeling awkward.
-Thank You Notes: Acknowledge relationships through gratitude.
D.Learning from Thought Leaders
Emphasizes the influence of notable figures like Nelson Mandela, Steve Jobs,
etc., on networking and relationship-building principles.
E. SECS Appeal:
Importance
of being Sociable, Energetic, Curious, and Self-confident.
F. Learning from Clients
-Understand that relationships are more significant than merely having clients.
-Stay connected to individuals as they may change roles or companies.
G.Learning from Competitors
-Stay alert to changes in trends and services to maintain competitive edge.
-Continuously innovate and improve to survive in a changing market.
-Self-Learning:Reflect on personal performance and growth.
-Five Dialogues Daily: Aim to have five meaningful conversations each day to
enhance relationship building.
-Focus on understanding client needs rather than self-promotion.
-Give Reminders: Provide clients with memorable items to maintain connections.
-Persistence: Overcome setbacks through consistent effort.
What is business developer work day?
Introduction to Change:
-The
author talks about his Transition from being a senior auditor to self-employed
business developer after the firm reneged on partnership agreement.
1.Routine is Essential: Importance of maintaining a daily routine
regardless of travel and work environment.
2.Organization Tools: Use of a diary for scheduling, tracking appointments, and
noting important details.
3.Mental Clarity: Staying present and logically organized during client
dealings is crucial for success.
4.Networking Goals: Aim to interact with at least five people daily to nurture
relationships and fill the sales pipeline.
5.Effective Sales Calls: Emphasize presence over preparation; approach meetings
with an open mind and focus on listening.
6.Exceptional Service: Providing excellent service is the best sales technique,
ensuring clients have positive experiences.
7.Feedback Mechanism: Regularly collect feedback to improve personal and
professional skills; use structured questions to
What are key important terminology mentioned in the book?
Here’s a summary of the key points from the book regarding important sales
topics, particularly online selling:
1.Online Selling Opportunities:
-Selling yourself, ideas, and services online is increasingly important.
-Platforms like LinkedIn can replace traditional CVs, while YouTube showcases
portfolios.
2.Managing Online Presence:
-Regularly Google your name to assess your online footprint and its impact on
sales.
3.Growing Online Presence:
-Selling ideas and services online requires consistent posting and active
engagement.
-Build a network by connecting with influential individuals and participating
in conversations.
4.Tools for Sales:
-Use software tools like Salesforce, apps, and digital newsletters to enhance
sales efforts.
-It's essential to manage these tools or seek help to focus on core selling
activities.
5.Influence of Big Data:
-Collect and utilize data to create additional service opportunities.
-Encourage the anonymous sharing of data to aid in negotiation processes.
6.Buyer's Perspective:
-Understanding the buyer's experience is crucial for successful selling.
-Recognize that trust and value creation are pivotal in the buyer-seller
relationship.
6.Sales Dialogue:
-Planning dialogues effectively can lead to better sales outcomes.
-Key skills include being present, respectful, and capable of softening
emotions during discussions.
7.Negotiation Skills:
-Preparation is vital; gather knowledge about the content, process, and
stakeholders involved in negotiations.
-Recognize that successful negotiation is a learning process and remain open to
dialogue.
8.Conflict Management:
-Conflict is a natural aspect of selling; developing strategies to manage it is
essential.
-Key tactics include changing the time or space of negotiations and staying
compassionate toward the buyer's needs.
9.Cultural Considerations:
-Selling across cultures requires understanding local customs and adapting
strategies accordingly.
-Recognize that building trust in new cultural contexts takes time and
dialogue.
10.Personal and Professional Growth:
-Engaging with different cultures can be beneficial, leading to personal
development and broader business opportunities.
-These points outline the essential strategies and considerations for
successfully selling oneself, ideas, and services in an increasingly digital
and global marketplace.
What is the conclusion in light of the book?
-Social selling opens doors but dialogue selling is essential for building
trust and relationships.
-Face-to-face interactions are crucial for successful business development.
-Effective relationship building differentiates sellers in a competitive
landscape.
-Highlighted three key selling principles:
Relationship Selling Principle
1.
Focus on relationships rather than just clients; people buy from people.
2.The Solution is in the Dialogue: Engage in regular dialogues to understand
client needs and drive innovation.
3.Create Momentum: Consistent outreach and engagement lead to success; don’t
wait for clients to come to you.
4.Encouragement to maintain high-quality relationships, dialogues, and market
activity for success in business development.
Thank you for reading, Please let me know,
How do you build relationships in AI Era? Do you prefer professional relationships or Personal relationships or both? Why?
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